An unexpected addition...

Well for the first time in years I've got that awful feeling of "OMG what if 'she' doesn't arrive when she's supposed to?"

You know how when you're a teenager and you do EVERYTHING to avoid getting pregnant, and you somehow believe that even looking at a penis is likely to get you pregnant. And each time you're due you start worrying, and are convinced this is 'it' when it's late.

Then when you WANT to get pregnant you believe it will never happen unless you do it non-stop for those three days mid cycle, and you have stand on your head for half an hour later and won't let any swimmers go to waste.

Anyway, I had that awful feeling hit me today... not that I haven't been using proection, but 'a la teenager', I'm stressing anyway.

So I've decided to bite the bullet and sort out some proper contraception, JUST IN CASE!!!

I don't know what to do. I can't do hormonal methods, as it's only worth using them if I'm going to actually WANT to get jiggy with it. The pill is tantamount to commiting murder... of my libido that is.

But the non hormonal ones are either condoms... which I'd use anyway for obvious reasons, but I don't want to be relying on them 100%... things get caught up in the moment, or carried away...

I'm now thinking something permanent might be the way to go. There is the 'essure' procedure which is non surgical and you can be in and out in less than a hour and back to normal activity almost straight away. It is even available as a public patient at St George hospital. Probably has a decent waiting list though.

But it's scary decision to make... I probaly shouldn't be thinking about this when I'm so bloody emotional. :-S